Only The Lonely

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Most people who deal with this don’t like to admit it, but they’re lonely.
There are a lot of lonely folks in this world. We don’t know the half of it.
We don’t know how many people lie awake at night, in their own private misery. We don’t see people behind closed doors when tears are streaming from their eyes, and their shoulders are heaving from heavy guttural sobs. We don’t see the person curled up under their covers, wishing something…anything could take away the loneliness that they feel. It’s a real feeling. Many times the very person you see who looks like they have it all together, or the person with a smile on their face, is the very same person who suffers from loneliness and maybe depression.

I’m not writing with the cure. I don’t think that there is a one-size-fits-all cure. But, I am writing to say that you are not alone. I am here and this wordpress community is here. I understand. I’m here to tell you to hold on. You’ll make it through this. But don’t try to do it by yourself. God loves you. You can pray to him.  Or you may only have 1 person in your life that cares, but, that’s 1 person that counts. Those people are a gift.  Some practical things you can do to stave off loneliness?  You might  try involving yourself in a recreational activity that you enjoy. Try to find joy in simple everyday things like, the smile of a friend, the sunshine, birds singing, a feel-good story on TV,  a good book or a favorite song. Try  projecting outwardly instead of shutting down inwardly by reaching out to help others (whether in the form of writing, volunteering, coaching sports, tutoring, etc.). And on the days when you need to cry, go ahead.

But, if your loneliness becomes too much for you to bear on your own, then there’s no shame in getting some outside help. Maybe see your doctor or a counselor. Sometimes a counselor can help guide us to the root of our feelings to help resolve them. Or sometimes there is something medically wrong that alters our moods and we don’t know if we don’t reach out to get that help from a physician. Never feel ashamed. If you are taking healthy steps to make sure you’re getting what you need to be your best, then you should feel proud of yourself.

Sending you a virtual hug & a song:
You are not alone – Michael Jackson

You are loved!

© 2013 “Only The Lonely” KD Corner / K.D.

Photo credit: youthvoices.net / google images

Ask Yourself…Then Act

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What inspires you?
Think about it.
What prompts you to WANT to change or WANT to do something different?
And do you follow through on the notion?
Or do you talk yourself out of it every time?
Are you ‘once bitten, twice shy’?
Are  you afraid to try something new again because you’ve gotten burned before?
Or are you afraid of failure?
OR….are you afraid of success?
What is your ‘kryptonite’?
What causes you to be sucked back into the vortex of your comfort zone?
Why do you choose doing the same thing you’ve always done and expect a different result?
Why are you comfortable with your dysfunctional baggage? Because it’s familiar? Is it helping you?
When are you going to say enough is enough?!
When are you going to go for it?!
Are you ALWAYS going to make excuses why you can’t or why it’s too hard?
Do you want to look back on your life and have regrets?
What will you do to spark change?
What will be your catalyst for change?
WHEN do you get up off of your excuses and DO something?
How/when/where will you step OUT of your comfort zone and dare to dream big?
Your big dream may be different from someone else’s, so do you let that scare you?
Are you always comparing yourself to others and then telling yourself you can’t do it?
Do you realize that you don’t have to listen to irrational doubts and fears?
Do you let failure defeat you?
Do you try and try again?
Do you come up with a new dream, a new plan when plan A doesn’t work out?
Do you keep stretching yourself to grow?
Don’t you realize you’re amazing?
Don’t you know that someone needs what you have to give?
Don’t you realize that your gift is needed in this world?
Don’t you see how unique and special you really are?
Don’t you think you’re worth it? Worth trying?
Ask yourself…Then Act.

Photo credit: stock.xchng – http://www.sxc.hu

Disclaimer – Never do something that’s going to hurt you or someone else. Don’t break the law or harm anyone or thing. This post is about following dreams & doing healthy, legal and good things.

One Thing Remains

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I was going to write a long commentary about love, God & and Valentine’s Day and being single vs. married, etc.  Believe me, I could say a LOT on the subject.  But, I changed my mind about that.  Instead, I just want to do this.  I want to encourage you today if Valentine’s Day is difficult for you.  I’m here for you as a virtual friend to “hold your hand” so to speak, and tell you that even though today is hard, you will make it through.  How do I know?  I have faith in you.

God loves you.  And believe me, I understand if you’re tired of hearing all of the Christian-isms about God & love on Valentine’s Day, so I won’t preach to you. Know that most people (including me) are well-meaning and only seek to encourage you.  And you may need that encouragement.  But, I understand that even though you know that God loves you and you walk in faith daily, sometimes it can still be difficult.  You may long for someone to just … understand.  And if you’re not a Christian, I know that believing in a God that loves you while you feel miserable inside may provide little comfort for you.  You don’t have to…but take my word for it, God does exist and he made you to exist because you’re special, you have purpose, and He adores you.  Even if a lot of awful things have happened to you at the hands of people who were hurtful and abusive and hateful…you’re still here because you have purpose.  And God kept you sane through all of the madness. God kept you alive through all of the craziness because God has a purpose for your life!  You matter!  Don’t let anyone tell you that you don’t.

Today, I have resolved to bless others.  Why? Because it’s better than feeling sorry for myself, that’s why :).  There are so many people in the world and in our circle of influence who may need some cheer today.  Maybe you’ve never paid attention before to that co-worker or neighbor or store vendor who could possibly use a bright smile from YOU and a,  “How are you today?” while actually looking into their eyes and really caring about how they’re doing.  Find a way to reach out to others today, even the grumpy ones, if you feel led to.  They may stay grumpy outwardly (but you never know how your act of kindness my have affected them inwardly).

I also wanted to also share this song in hopes of encouraging you.  God’s love is the One Thing that is consistent in my life, the One Thing that Remains:

Words and Video below:
VIDEO LINK (music with lyrics) –> HERE!!! (skip the ad)

One Thing Remains – Kristian Stanfill
Lyrics:

Higher than the mountains that I face
Stronger than the power of the grave
Constant in the trial and the change
This one thing remains
This one thing remains

Your love never fails
It never gives up
It never runs out on me
[x3]

Your love

And on and on and on and on it goes
It overwhelms and satisfies my soul
And I’ll never ever have to be afraid
‘Cause this one thing remains

Your love never fails
It never gives up
It never runs out on me
[x3]

Your love

In death, in life
I’m confident and covered
By the power of Your great love

My debt is paid
There’s nothing that can separate
My heart from Your great love

Your love never fails
It never gives up
It never runs out on me
[x2]

And on and on and on and on it goes
It overwhelms and satisfies my soul
And I’ll never ever have to be afraid
‘Cause this one thing remains

Your love never fails
It never gives up
It never runs out on me
[x3]

Your love
It’s Your love
God I know Your love is never-ending
Your love is never-failing
It’s Your love, Your love, Your love ♥

Happy Valentine’s Day to all of you!

© “One Thing Remains (blog)” by KD Corner 2013

You ARE Good Enough!

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A friend of mine recently posted a picture on her Facebook page of someone holding a sticky note that says “you are good enough!” It hit home. I don’t know about you, but, so many times I question, “am I good enough?”

Am I good enough to be loved?
Am I good enough to fit into that social circle?
Am I good enough to be accepted?
Am I good enough to be respected?
Am I good enough to complete that project or reach that goal?
Am I good enough to seal that huge deal at work?
Am I good enough to be valued by others?

The list could go on and on. What makes us question our own value? Have we been told by someone that we’re not valuable? Has it been demonstrated by another person’s actions toward us that we are not up to snuff? Have others made us feel that somehow we’ll never measure up to the perfection they expect? Or has it been communicated to us somehow that others don’t see us as able enough, talented enough, or intelligent enough to obtain a certain goal?

I daresay most of us have had such an experience in our lives. Sometimes we experience this type of criticism or rejection by well-meaning people in our families, friendships, social or professional circles. The trick is not believing the naysayers. Constructive criticism is one thing. It is usually given in such a way as to build up the person. It should be given with care and in a way that will help the person see where they can tweak or improve in a certain area without tearing them to shreds verbally.

But, if you’ve received harsh criticism or if you’ve been overlooked, berated, undervalued, etc., I’ve got news for you. You ARE good enough! The truth is that God made each of us uniquely special. We don’t all have the same set of talents and abilities, but, there is greatness in each of us!  There is something each of us are wired to do and to do well. Don’t undervalue your unique gifts.  Develop them and use them to bless others.

As you move forward to develop your gifts and talents, you may experience instances or periods of failure.  But, remember this –  failure at a task or a goal does NOT equal your failure as a person.  Your “who” is not determined by your “do”.  Some things you will have to continuously practice at to hone your skills in a certain area. Other things you will try and then realize that particular thing may not be for you. But the important thing is that you TRIED. You didn’t hold back. There will be no regrets because you attempted it. John Maxwell (author) has written a whole series of books, CD’s called “Fail Forward”. Even if you fail at something, if you learn from it, you’ve not failed at all. You’ve gained more valuable knowledge with which to move forward and tackle the next goal.

Your value  as a person, is not and should not be defined by people, but, by God. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. There is no one exactly like you. You are loved with a love that never wanes and never ends. And in those times where others put you down or you experience failure of some kind, you’ll need to remind yourself of this fact: YOU are SPECIAL.  If you have to, write it on sticky notes and stick it all around your house or apartment.  And surround yourself with positive people!  We each need people who are in our corner and believe in us!  It’s important.  Also, one of the best things you can do is let someone else know how special and important they are. I’m a huge advocate of paying it forward.  There are so many people in the world who have not been told how valuable and special they are.  And God may use YOU to be the one to tell them.  You can plant a seed of love into someone else’s life.  And you never know how big that seed will grow or what it will develop into.  Maybe because of you, someone who wanted to quit life, decides to continue on and becomes an amazing motivator of others.  Maybe that person who was going to quit med school goes on to become a world renowned physician or surgeon.  You never know.  So, as I hopefully breathe life into you, so, breathe life into others.  Remember how spectacular you are!  Silence the voices of the naysayers and shout out loud, “I AM GOOD ENOUGH!”

© KD Corner “You ARE Good Enough” 2013

photo credit here

Life

I felt deeply impressed to write this tonight. I know many people struggle with wanting to give up on life and I want to be a voice for them. And I want to give hope to those who have none.  Use your gift to help, bless, encourage others.  This ‘poem’ is called “Life”.

Don’t give up…on life
Hope…dried up like parched land
Pain…so deeply piercing vibrates through my soul
Patience…gone
Anger…rising and falling
Sobs…shaking my body uncontrollably
Numb
Glassy eyed
Should I end it? My life?
Would it ease the pain?
But…my family, my friends
I cannot leave them
Thoughts swirling
Pain hits me in waves
I hear my name
My thoughts interjected by Him
Calling my name
Again and again
Telling me not to give up
Telling me over and over
That I’m
Not alone
I’m not…alone.
But I’m tired.
“Carry me, Lord,” I say
I pray a quick prayer
The darkness begins to lift
But what can I do?
I will write
I will write and tell the story to others
So that they… don’t give up
If through my pain, I can help someone else
Then I have won.

© KD Corner 2012, “Life”

Image courtesy of sattva / FreeDigitalPhotos.net